The ‘dream’ Father’s Day

June 19, 2015, Article by Mr Book in Culture

With Father’s Day fast approaching, we asked a few authors to describe their experiences of this ‘special’ day, and tell us how they’d ideally spend this Sunday…

Ian Buxton

Whisky expert and author of 101 Legendary Whiskies You’re Dying to Try But (Possibly) Never Will

Ian Buxton (© Ric Bacon)

Ian Buxton (© Ric Bacon)

Would I be on a yacht anchored in some Caribbean idyll? Or would I be opening the batting for England at Lords?

Let’s get real. Father’s Day might be about father but a father is nothing without his children so I can imagine myself with my two sons (sadly, no daughters ever arrived) plundering rare casks in the warehouses at Glenfarclas or Highland Park. Or, if we’re really dreaming, then add some first class flights to Kentucky and we can savour some rarities in the legendary Stitzel-Weller distillery.

I count myself fortunate that my boys have grown to love whisky. It’s my gift to them!

Paul Fraser Collard

Author of the Jack Lark series of novels and ebook novellas

Paul Fraser Collard (© Martin Collard)

Paul Fraser Collard (© Martin Collard)

When my kids were young the ideal Father’s Day would have been simple. A bit of peace and quiet, and the chance of a cheeky beer in the garden. Job done. Now my guys are somewhat older and such things are possible, yet I find myself rather hankering after a handmade card, a keyring in the vague shape of a cricket bat, or perhaps a painted paper mache flowerpot. I’ll still take that beer if it’s offered, but perhaps I’ll hope for something a little more homemade at my bedside this Sunday.

J. S. Law

Author of Tenacity, a debut crime thriller out next month

J.S. Law (© Simon John)

J.S. Law (© Simon John)

What is Father’s Day?

It used to be the day when I’d be woken,
Thinking that something expensive was broken
The kids would be screaming, but it was brekkie that’s made
Soggy cornflakes, burnt toast and too thick marmalade

The gifts littered the bed like discarded tissues
And for that day alone I didn’t have any issues
Everyone behaved on ‘Dad’s special day’
There was nothing I wanted that wasn’t my way

But kids get older and things often change
The little mites that loved me now seem slightly strange
I wake up on Father’s Day awaiting my glory
But do let me tell you, it’s a whole different story

I walk down the hallway and look in on my son
He’s hidden under his duvet like a man on the run
Out of the end of his bed poke only his socks
And I can’t stop to talk because he’s on the Xbox

My daughter starts squealing when I enter her room
She’s playing Lego
Star Wars in the dull blue gloom
I go to open the window if the room’s a bit smelly
But get shouted at and told off for being in the way of the telly

It’s a glum life now being a father of teens
They seem to have forgotten what Father’s Day means
But all isn’t lost as I turn up some Bob Marley
Because this means a whole day out riding my Harley

A poem by JS Law, aged 39 and 1/3 (I think it’s a poem cos it rhymes, mostly…)

Father’s day for me is all about doing all the things I love. Spending time with my family, doing some writing, and then taking the bike out for a burn (followed by a few cold beers) – if there’s a finer way to spend a day, then I’ve yet to hear of it.